I'm being very adventurous and staying up past my normal bedtime tonight, and even more adventurous by starting this post after I've had my cocoa!
Reading of Cosmo's news reminded me of the torture that is sleep deprivation. I really, really need my sleep (although obviously not tonight) and remember only too vividly the first twelve weeks of said torture after baby number one was born.
Baby number one was a bit of a bruiser, and the starvo had the appetite of a herd of horses. From day one he demanded 3 hourly feeds, and before long he was on three hourly 9oz bottles (yep, in case you hadn't realised, I'm not Earth Mother)
I clearly remember sitting in the nursey feeding him his bottles in a semi-comatose state. The unfortunate thing about baby number one was that he had a bit of a reflux issue thing going on, so four times out of five, just as I had finished giving him his bottle, it would all appear back up again like a white tidal wave enveloping the whole room.
So I had to start all over again.
And then I had to clean up the mess.
During these overnight feeding sessions I used to see the milkman on his rounds. He came at 3.00am on the dot every morning. I hated that milkman.
Of course, when you finally can take it no longer and start sneaking baby rice into bedtime feeds, you still can't sleep because you're in checking baby every three hours to see if he's alright because he hasn't woken up.
I was ready for it all with baby number two. I went into intensive training. I started drinking coffee for the caffeine. I invested in boxes of matchsticks.
But goodness, what a difference. She had the appetite of a sparrow on a diet and would sleep for eight (yes 8) hours at a time. And when she did wake up, she never cried. She just lay there and smacked her lips!
In the hospital they used to ask me every morning how many overnight feeds, and I'd simply pluck a figure out of the air. I think one morning I must have been caught off guard and said six or something because my scam was blown. Sister arrived in and told me I should wake baby up every four hours for a feed, even during the night. I distinctly remember just looking at her with my mouth hanging open thinking 'you must take me for a nutter!'
I thank the Lord every day that my babies were born in the order they were. If the starvo had arrived after the sparrow, I think I might have sold myself to the gypsies, or given him to the milkman. Certainly I'd have been a candidate for the mental institution or the divorce courts.
And on that sage thought, I'm off to kiss my two 'babies' on the head and whisper goodnight, cause I can hear the ruddy milkman coming up the street!
PS the cocoa bits a joke - honestly.
2 comments:
Sleep deprivation does have its advantages in teaching. When our last baby was born I was so tired every day that I had no discipline problems in school. The pupils could be swinging from the lights and I didn't have enough energy to let it bother me.
I think God is amazing in His ways of training us for these things. You know, before you have the baby you have to get up to go pee every hour, then after finally getting the baby to sleep through the night there are the viruses and the stomach aches and various ailments. Then, once they learn how to drive, then off to college (or like my 2 oldest, the army and soon the war). Mind you, you take a nap or two in there. But I don't think my sleep has been the same since the babies were born. ALL that said, this was a lovely post.
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