Saturday, November 27, 2010

Canny Scots

So, in a moment of (rare) Scottish rugby inspiration, the powers that be decided that the national team should play Samoa, from the hot and balmy South Sea Islands, in Aberdeen while it was under a foot of snow.


Friday, November 26, 2010

Hot off the press

I need to preface this post by explaining that last weekend my son was promoted in rugby and moved up a team in the rankings. Samoa no more, although I have not yet been able to establish exactly what nationality he now is.

I had a text from him at 8:45am to tell me he has been selected to play in a match against Wallace High School this afternoon. Yeah!

I've just had a second text to say he's been selected to play on the left wing. Not bad for a scrum half.

As it is currently hailstoning with the promise of more snow today, I just hope it's not called off...


OK, what's going on here?

Is this bloke a world class idiot, who stole the money, left it on his car roof and drove off, only to call the police later and say he'd lost the (stolen) money? Or is he just a regular idiot who put £80,000 on the roof of his car and forgot about it?

And, just as a point of order BBC, should that last quote not read ' Essex Police have seized evidence' as opposed to 'has seized evidence'?

Rant over. You can all continue what you were doing...

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving

In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Countdown to Christmas: part 1

Whilst browsing the 'Ultimate Christmas' book by Jane Newdick tonight in search of an inspired recipe for cranberry sauce (don't ask) I came across Ms Newdick's countdown to the festive season.

Firstly, I should point out that the countdown started six weeks ago, so already I am off to a very poor start and may, in fact, have to cancel the holiday. However, with just over four weeks to go, this is what we should all be doing:

Printing gift wrap. Yes. Printing it. Already I am glad I live so conveniently to a major UK retailer who does this for me. Every little helps.

Make gift boxes to fit gifts. Well, if I do this now, I will have to buy gifts to fit gift boxes. Just let me see.... ah yes, gift shopping was to be completed two weeks ago. Epic fail.

Start using Advent calendar and let children write to Santa. Point of order here. My children don't write to Santa. It's a little known fact that Santa is indeed telepathic and does not actually require a letter to know what goodies to supply for Christmas. However, he does like a little note every so often that just says hello and enquire after the reindeer.

Plan theme for dining table and make festive decorations, such as crackers (you'd need to be to make them) and painted glassware. Well, on the theme issue, I'm thinking this year I might go for a Christmas theme. What do you think?

Make decorations using dried fruit and artificial ingredients, such as wreaths, door swags and garlands. Uh huh. My family are going to be so deprived this year.

Plan lighting, such as lanterns or twig chandelier. I get the feeling Ms Newdick has inside information of a massive power failure over the region on Christmas Day. Anyone with shares in Northern Ireland Electricity...sell, sell! SELL!!

Oh hold on, that's me...

Order special food as necessary, such as turkey, goose or fish. Oh yes, I see. I was supposed to have made that menu decision four weeks ago. And the only reason you are to order these foods is because they are the only foods you do not make yourself from scratch. Unless you live on a turkey, goose or fish farm of course.

Hold on, I've just thought of something: how do you cook your turkey, goose and fish with the expected electricity outage? Hmmm...need to order more gas for the BBQ

Anyone else thinking Ms Newdick has too much time on her hands?

Right, off to read page 127 to see how I should paint my Tyrone crystal wine glasses and then to find those NIE shares...

Post analysis

I have received the following catalogues through my letterbox in the past 24 hours:
  • Lakeland
  • Gray & Osbourn
  • House of Bath
  • M and M Direct Outdoor wear
  • Turtlemat
  • Ikea
  • Hawkins Bazaar
  • Argento
  • Figleaves

I wonder, what does this say about me.....

Often found in the mountains wearing Betty Barclay sweaters and a pandora bracelet?
Likes cookery gadgets and keeps them in Ikea boxes?
Buys silly stocking fillers and puts them in designer stockings?

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

It's official

I am mother of Mary, mother of Jesus. That's a promotion I think ... last year I was mother of Louis Walsh!

Friday, November 05, 2010

First Gig

I am still the source of much discussion and debate. Or rather my clothes are. It was decided I should dress like the men; jacket and bow tie.

It's not funny any more.

Tuesday, November 02, 2010