I have killed my iPhone. It is dead as a dead thing, stone cold, tatie bread as we say here.
It started on Thursday night. Not that the death was long, slow and drawn out. Oh no, that bit happened almost instantaneously. It was the diagnosis of death that has taken so long.
I was updating to version 3.0 so I could send photos by text. Do I ever wish now I hadn't bothered my backside? Does Dolly Parton sleep on her back?? Anyway, I went through the processes of downloading the new version of iTunes so I could download the new version of whatever it was I needed to send photos.
And then I just did as I was told. And the phone died. Now, I kept getting messages that said it wasn't dead ... OK, what they actually said was that the phone was 'recovering', but this transpires to be a lie. However, in vain hope I sat for four hours going through the same processes, round and round in circles, getting the same messages. Nothing.
So I took it to the Apple expert on Friday, my brother, who pronounced it terminally ill. Advice from O2, my service provider, was needed.
This I sought last night, and for another nearly two hours I went round and round in the same circles again with nice O2 lady on the phone (landline; remember, mine is dead) Eventually, she admits defeat and refers me to Apple, who had closed up shop for the day.
This morning, another two hours of going round the same circles, but with a few different exercises thrown in for variety's sake. Apparently, out of all the trouble there has been downloading version 3 in Ireland, and , I am assured, there has been lots of trouble, I am the only soul on the whole of the island of Ireland who has received an error code 2.
Is this supposed to make me feel better?
After consultation with supervisors and much pondering, the pronouncement of death was finally made at 10:40am. It is currently on it's way to the Apple store in Belfast for post mortem.
I take some comfort in that I am the owner of the first iPhone in the world (probably) to die of it's version of swine flu. But not much.