Lightning; it does strike twice

Why do I always get the Minis who want to 'Mini adventures' all on their own? Some of you may remember this story about my previous Mini, Mini Mouse.

Well today, not to be outdone, new Mini, Mini Sidewalk had an adventure all of her own.

The kids and I had just returned home from a few jobs we'd had to do on the first day of the holidays. Dolly was helping me carry the shopping into the kitchen and Michael was putting his rugby balls away in the garage.

Suddenly Dolly started screeching 'mummy, mummy, mummy!!' and I ran into the hall just in time to see Mini Sidewalk roll down the driveway into the garage wall.

Crunch.

And yes, before you ask, the handbrake was on. Needless to say, Mini Sidewalk now has an urgent appointment with the mechanic.

2395

My number. For 'Race for Life'. I sustained a training injury this week - I got a blister.

Please sponsor me

Proud as Punch

Dolly was selected to play in a Mini Rugby Tournament today. It was a rotten old day weather wise but she didn't let that deter her and she played a blinder, even though she was soaking and freezing.

Here she is enjoying a post tournament hotdog after a hard mornings graft. Please also notice my lovely candy-stripe wellies!

Did you know

Stansted airport is one of the most secure airports in the world? If you've ever been there, you'll be as bemused by this statement as I was when I was told.

I fell in with a security man at the airport on Tuesday night as I was heading home from London. As I was walking down to my departure gate he called me over to inspect my boarding pass. As he checked, he looked both ways up and down the corridor, leaned towards my ear and whispered 'President Obama is landing here within the hour.' I think I even got the wink. I gave him the honour of feigning suitable excitement but stopped just short of performing the happy dance.

I did, however, ask the obvious question ... why in the world would he fly into poxy Stansted Airport? (Although, obviously I didn't use the word poxy as I didn't want to hurt his feelings ... or be arrested) Well, apparently Stansted is one of the most secure airports in the world! My new conspirator tells me it has it's own permanent SAS presence and a tank battalion on site. Not so poxy, eh??!

When I got to the gate, in an attempt to beat Obama's arrival, our Ryanair crew did everything bar tell us there was £50 notes sellotaped to the aircraft seats to get us on board as quickly as possible, but it was no good. We had to wait on the apron whilst Airforce One landed and the President cleared the airport by helicopter. A major delay by Ryanair's standards.

We got to watch Airforce One land, big wow. Well, I didn't find it that exciting but the man across the aisle from me was fairly interested and moved into the empty row behind me for a better view.

When we eventually got clearance to 'go ... go ... go ...!' a stewardess arrived and instructed the man he 'must move back to his original seat on the other side of the plane for the correct balance of the aircraft.' Everyone looked up, expecting to see a big ten tonne tussie squeeze himself out of the row and across the aisle, and this wee weed of a thing appears ...

We did experience some mild turbulence on our flight home and every time we had a wee bump or wobble, everyone glared at our friend who had dared to move seats, blaming him for the temporary imbalance of the aircraft.

Finally, on the subject of airlines ... this from Pluto:

A man is sitting in the bar in departures at a busy airport. A beautiful woman walks in and sits down at the table next to him. He decides that because she's got a uniform on, she's probably an off-duty flight attendant. So he decides to have a go at picking her up by identifying the airline she flies for, thereby impressing her greatly.

He leans across to her and says the Delta Airlines motto:'We love to fly and it shows' The woman looks at him blankly. He sits back and thinks up another line. He leans forward again and delivers the Air France motto: 'Winning the hearts of the world'. Again she just stares at him with a slightly puzzled look on her face. Undeterred, he tries again, this time saying the Malaysian Airlines motto: 'Going beyond expectations'.

The woman looks at him sternly and says; 'What the %*$&*# do you want?'

'Ah!' he says, sitting back with a smile on his face. "Ryanair."

Barking!

I think that when you meet someone for the first time under a 20 foot high Freddy Mercury that's a sign it's you're going to have a mad time.

'Well,' says Judy after a few minutes confusion and a phonecall to get us both to the same tube exit at the same time, 'you know London better than me - you'd better show me around.' LOL! What a start!

And so, as we tramped down Oxford Street, we fell into conversation as if we'd been meeting each other for lunch for years.

Judy takes me to the local Internet cafe

We had such a laugh I couldn't possibly start to go into it all here, but a personal highlight of the afternoon, in particular for those sitting around us in Starbucks at the time, had to be when we both rolled up our trousers to the knee and compared varicose veins and dodgy ankles, as you do!

And, if you ever have the opportunity to meet Judy, ask to see her moonwalk. Extraordinary, and that's just the facial expressions!

After a great afternoons craic, Judy had to rush off to realign her garden lights to simulate the runway at Stansted in the hope O'Bama's plane would land in her back garden. As you do.

Waiting to meet Obama

I am sat at Stansted airport waiting to meet President Obama who is arriving here later for G20. I hope he is as much fun as Judy ... more on that to follow :-)

Blog meet: Debenhams

I am going to London for a couple of days to shop in Mango (ours has been removed and I feel the loss keenly) and meet Secret Agent Schultz, she of the most contagious laugh!

For those of you who are confused by the title of this post, Judy lives in Debenhams at Barking. Barking. I should fit right in.

Why I can't have football

This would never happen at a rugby match. Bloody Neanderthals.

Crown of Thorns

Clark Datchler, former singer with 80's wonders 'Johnny Hates Jazz' in case you recognise the dulcet tones.

I love love love this song. I bought it on 12" when it was released in 1990. I've not heard it for years, and years ... and years! I was, and still am, mesmerised by the lyrics.

There's a really strong message here and I'd love to ask Datchler where he stands spiritually and what's behind his words.

Enjoy ... opinions welcome!

Breaking News ...

There is a camping trip in the offing ...

Race for Life

Can I start by saying that although the title of this fundraiser is 'Race for Life' I will absolutely not be moving any faster than a dander*. That sorts out any Trade Description issues up front.

Please feel free to dig deep or alternatively, chuck in a couple of quid. Any money raised means Cancer Research UK can work at preventing, diagnosing and treating cancer, and that's a very worthy cause, even if watching me walk 5 km on two dodgy ankles isn't!

If you know me online, maybe you'd like to sponsor me online – it’s quick, easy enough for even me to understand and totally secure. Just click on the sponsor me button thing over there -->

If you are a UK taxpayer, please tick the Gift Aid box when donating so that an extra 25%, plus a 3% supplement, can be added to your gift at no cost to you. That means your £2 becomes £2.57 or something like that; maths was never a strong point.

Anyway, what's important about Gift Aid is that we get a chance to fleece the government together !

Thanks in advance for any monetary donations. Chocolate donations are also welcome, but no training advice please. Feel free to pop along and watch the event ... feel free to bring an oxygen tank with you if you do.

*dander, leisurely stroll: 'John's just gone out for a wee bit of a dander.'

Random thoughts

Aircrew (and even apparently one pilot) on Irish airlines have allegedly been wearing Irish rugby shirts this week. The party rolls on.

I got word that in Houston they are having an Irish music festival. Here in Belfast we have just started a month long shopping festival. I wonder did someone somewhere got those two venues mixed up.

Mother's cat is staying with us this week. Await disaster.

Having said I would do the Cancer Research 'Race for Life' it is now probably time I actually did something to get ready for that. Like walk the length of myself, or even registering would be useful.

I am babysitting my nine month old niece tomorrow. She is very smiley and very contented and I trained nursery assistants for 5 years so I'm sure we will get on great. She doesn't need a litter tray so already she's on a better footing than the cat.

Spandau Ballet are reforming again today. A lot of 80's groups seem to be taking up their zimmers and boosting their (probably collapsed) pension plans by reforming. I'm not excited. Now, if Johnny Hates Jazz were to do it ...

Finally, when asked to name the core values of the Ireland rugby team, Paul O'Connell (next Lions captain - watch this space) responded "Honesty and integrity - big Irish things - and being humble as well."

I think that sums us up pretty well. Here endeth the lesson.

And now, we can breathe again

Green is the colour

I have just returned from a quick dash to the local shopping centre where I stocked up on supplies to enable us to sit in front of the tele and watch three consecutive rugby matches as the rugby Six Nations comes to it's finale today.

It's a big day for Ireland, first chance at the grand slam in 61 years. Not that I honestly think we'll do the slam, but I believe we'll win the championship.

Anyway, it appears everyone in Ireland is wearing green today; I saw more green in Forestside this morning than I even saw in Houston on St Patrick's Day, and that's saying something! One in ten shoppers was sporting an Irish rugby shirt. The shopping centre was buzzing, but come 12.30pm I'd say the shops will be deserted!

My prediction then: Italy for the spoon, I think England will win the Calcutta Cup, mores the pity, and although I think Wales will beat Ireland robbing them of the Grand Slam, I don't think they will get the win of 13 points they need to deprive Ireland of the Championship. So ...

C'MON IRELAND ...

Did you hear the one about the Irish woman

trying to cross the road in Houston?

Everythng is bigger in Texas, even the roads. Yesterday I had occasion to cross a minor seven lane road to get to the shops. An absolute necessity!

So I pushed the button and waited for the green man, but here he is white. Interesting point - is the green man only green in Ireland??

So I am waiting and waiting because I don't want to be caught jaywalking and sent to jail as I think they might have the death penalty here. Eventually the white man appears and I start to walk. I get to the end of the second of, don't forget seven lanes of traffic, and the white man disappears and the big red hand starts flashing at me.

I stop dead. Panic!! What do I do? Do I turn back to where I started, or do I keep going in my original direction? Peopel in their cars are looking at me oddly and I know it's not because I'm wearing my St Patrick's Day bloopers. SO I make a snap decision to continue to the other side ... and run like hell!

I'm safe mum, all those posts Nancy's about to make about visiting me in hospital - they're not true!

Houston

I can't really blog too well as I am working from a funny wee keyboard thing on my knee sitting on the bed in my room. I am still on Belfast time which means I was awake from 5am local, ready for the shops at 8am just to discover that the shops don't open until 10am!!!

And they call this civilised society?? :-p

I am now speaking American quite fluently, although not as fluently as some of my American friends are speaking Belfast. Dana has an 'awesome' Belfast accent ... say 'now' Dana! I have read a lot of phonebooks and repeated a lot of nursery rhymes for peoples pleasure.

I love the ads on TV here. You gotta love them - they go on forever. And they are not afraid to advertise anything. I was in the bathroom last night cleaning my teeth listening to the ads and this one comes on "Ladies, is your contraception pill not working for you..." (told you they advertise everything) "... then try neutering!" I'm thinking 'wow! now I've really heard it all, human neutering advertised on the tele!'

Out of curiosity I dashed into the bedroom to see what pictures they had put with these words to discover the ad was for Nuta-Ring, a new form of contraceptive coil.

I am having a great time here with the 'gals', Houston First Baptist blew my tiny Irish brain, Southern hospitality is all it's cracked up to be and today there is a rumour going about that the sun will shine! Yee-ha!

To finish, yesterday in Barnes and Noble I finally discovered what the 'X' in the St Patricks day alphabet stands for. I can't believe I didn't think of it myself ... that most Irish of musical instruments ... Xylaphone. My education is now complete.

Thankyou

to the lovely people of Texas who went out of their way to welcome me to Houston in a traditional Irish way by blowing up the offices next door to my hotel at 7am (local) this morning!

Bloggers meet: Houston

In just a couple of hours I will be leaving to start the first leg of my journey to Houston, Texas, to meet Dana, Kelly and Nancy. And possibly a yellow rose, or two.

I will also be exporting enough bread to keep the Irish economy ticking over for the foreseeable future and to clear Paul Rankin's tax bill!

Friday 13th

Flying to Houston with Continental on a Boeing 777-200. From todays Independent; should I be worried:

Warning over safety of Boeing engines
Rolls-Royce ordered to redesign fuel component to resist build-up of ice

A faulty component in the engines of Boeing 777 aircraft which caused two near-fatal accidents could malfunction on other planes at any moment, the US air accident investigation body warns.

The National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) issued an "urgent safety recommendation" on Wednesday in which it said there was a "high probability of something similar happening". It instructed engine manufacturers Rolls-Royce to redesign the part, and told airlines to ensure it is fitted to all aircraft using the affected engines at the earliest available opportunity.

Yes please, like TODAY ;-)

Belfast, 10/03/09, 13:00hrs